Ellen Hokit (she/her)
MA (Counseling, in progress)
ellen@intrepidtherapy.com
-
Welcome; I invite you to a therapeutic experience grounded in authenticity, where we’ll work together to unpack the complexities of your emotions and build a stronger relationship with yourself. I will be beside you as we look at the stories attached to your emotions and experiences, and work to build a more effective relationship with them. Detaching from, and unpacking old stories and experiences can help you target what is causing you suffering presently. It will also assist in building more tolerance for unpleasant experiences, and have more capacity to control outcomes in the future. And while life can be a constant tension between challenge and ease, it is my hope that you are able to find yourself effective in both experiences, and stand powerfully in who you are.
As a deeply attuned therapist, you can trust that you will be truly seen and known in our relationship. I know how transformative it can be to have a relationship with someone who holds space for the complexity of who you are, knows what matters to you, and sees your inherent goodness. Together, we have an opportunity to rewrite parts of your story that may have missed that complexity, meaning and goodness in you. Those are the most crucial parts.
-
My therapeutic style has been informed by a handful of different modalities and strategies. To understand your story more holistically, I work from a larger lens of attachment and relationships. Working from an attachment lens helps me understand some of the interpersonal challenges or reactions that can feel disjointed. It can also help me in understanding the way that you feel and process big emotions, your ability to be flexible and open to changes in your environment, the tone and content of your internal voice, what you expect from others, and so much more. From there, I pull from Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT), Narrative therapy, and Somatic therapy.
I am drawn to folks who:
struggle with emotional regulation
have experienced interpersonal, or complex trauma
struggle with anxiety, shame and self-doubt
feel stuck in old, harmful beliefs about self and others
Together, we will figure out what this looks like for you, specifically. If you are someone who likes homework, or tasks in between sessions we can incorporate that into your therapy. If homework would be overwhelming to your already busy schedule, then we will work to create a space that feels like a relief for you. At any point throughout our work together, we can adjust to ensure that therapy is working for you, and that you’re getting the most out of it. -
I have been on a search for what was underlying my unique mental health challenges for many years. I have always had a drive to understand more about mental health due to my own complex, and personal background. For many years, I struggled and searched for a diagnosis or experience that could accurately describe my experience. This included different therapists, different kinds of therapy, and different levels of awareness on my part. Each setting and each therapist contributed to my eventual understanding, and I wouldn’t have made it to each step if it weren’t for the one prior that prepared me. The point at which I felt things really shift for me however, was when I began doing Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT). It is hard for me to say why therapy really started to “click” at that point, because I think it was a combination of factors. As I stated before, my own level of willingness to see, and acknowledge the ways that I was struggling was a long process; an ongoing one, in fact! I also really benefited from the practical skills that DBT offers, and was eager to use them. Finally, having a relationship with my therapist who really got me. I had lost my sense of self in those years of suffering, and he made it safe enough to return. This experience largely influences my approach to therapy, and is why I orient myself to relationships. This world has offered us all the message that if we are productive enough, independent enough, successful enough then things will fall into place. These ideals are harmful and perpetuate loneliness. Instead, what I have found is that regardless of your diagnosis or struggle, connection and validation are healing. Unlearning ideals instilled by society takes time and patience, and love from your therapist :)
-
I practice from a foundation of attachment and relationships, but the specific tools and strategies offered to you will be tailored to your goals. The ways in which we form connections, and build a sense of self in relation to others, begins at the earliest stages of life. Understanding some of your early in life experiences can help us target what is causing you struggle presently. Your ability to emotionally regulate, be more flexible and less rigid, connect to your body, and much more are all impacted by our earliest relationships.
The therapeutic modalities, or theories that I typically pull from are Attachment theory, Dialectical Behavioral Theory (DBT), Narrative Therapy, and Somatic Therapy.
Mental health issues including, but not limited to Anxiety, Social Anxiety, Depression, Borderline Personality Disorder, CPTSD, PTSD are welcome.
Symptoms/Experiences that can be targeted through these modalities: Loneliness, shame, relationships, mood swings, trauma, emotional avoidance, attachment styles, interpersonal effectiveness, emotion regulation, suicidality, crisis, emotional distress, isolation, racing thoughts, no sense of self, emotional neglect, disordered eating.
-
I find that a balance between alone time and social time is important in my own healing. I love to be at home with my partner, and our three kids (cats). I usually have a project going on; most recently I refinished some old furniture. I enjoy cooking, and like to show others my love through cooking and sharing a meal together. Even better if I have grown anything we’re eating!
I practice yoga almost daily, which for me is both a place to ground, and move my body in a way that feels playful.
I also love to be with my friends! I get a lot of joy and connection from being with the people who know me best, and who I can always laugh with. Having meals, dancing, playing games, and hiking are some of my favorite things to do with friends.
Lastly, I love book and podcast recommendations! I tend to reach for memoirs and non-fiction, but would like to expand my library :)
-
Online Psychotherapy and Therapeutic Coaching
$60 session fee
Insurance: not accepted
Schedule directly through online scheduler.
If you’re unable to find an available time that works for you, please reach out to ellen@intrepidtherapy.com
